When I was in my 20s, I had a severe case of FOMO (Fear of Missing Out). It wasn’t called that back then, but trust me, if there was a party, concert, event or even people just hanging out in the hallway of my dorm room, I needed to be where the action was.
Then, a strange thing happened. I fell in love, got married, and a couple of kids later, I developed some new fears such as falling over from exhaustion, being mistaken for a zombie and forgetting to feed my kids dinner (which I actually did one time). The good news is that my kids, my husband and I survived and I can tell you from personal experience that it’s all likely to work out just fine.
Instead of FOMO, now I prefer GTSE (going to sleep early). As Oprah once said, “You can have it all, you just can’t have it all at once.” My advice: Decide what “having it all” means to you, and then let some of the other things go. It’s OK to skip things and not help everyone all the time. Your real friends will understand. Weed the others from your life. I know it’s easier said than done, but below are 10 tips that may help.
1. Outsource as much as you can.
Figure out exactly how much money you need to fund the essentials and then you’ll know what you have left. This is usually called discretionary income, but instead think of it as your “outsourcing income”—and outsource whatever you can afford. Then, you can spend more time doing the things you love with the people you love. This is likely to mean some sacrifices, but that’s where deciding what’s really important comes in.
2. If you have a partner, divide and conquer.
Talk about it upfront, so it’s clear and you can avoid finger-pointing later. You can do this along any lines that make sense. Some people still divide chores in a typically gendered manner—don’t judge! Whatever works, works! For my husband and me it often came down to who hated a chore less.
3. Find your food groove.
If you like cooking, then by all means cook, but if you don’t, there are numerous options available today for food-delivery services. If this doesn’t work for you, try preparing a bunch of meals at one time to make weekday dinners easier to manage.